Radical Self-Forgiveness - Exercise 1: IDENTIFYING MY AUTHENTIC SELF

What is my "authentic self", you ask? Well... let me attempt to explain...

In his book, RADICAL SELF-FORGIVENESS, Colin Tipping explains that we all have several different "selves" inside our being. No, we're not Sybil... this goes much deeper than a multiple personality disorder. Housed within our beings, we have a total of 9 selves. They are...

1. My Judging Self
2. My Inferred Self
3. My Saboteur Self
4. My Self-Loving Self
5. My Socially Modified Self
6. My Ideal Self
7. My Sexual Self
8. My Authentic Human Self
9. My "I Am" Self

I will further explain the balance of the "selves", tomorrow.... for now, let's find out about MY Authentic Human Self, shall we?

First, the definition of my "Authentic Human Self": This is the self that expresses my natural essence as a human being. It's who I am at the core of my personality...my basic character... my genetically determined disposition and way of being, both good and bad. In humans, as long as we are not seriously altered by early life experiences severe enough to cause a split into subpersonalities (did someone say "Sybil"?), we will be more or less this same person all our lives.

So... what is my Authentic Human Self? Let's look at the activity and find out the answers to this question. This activity simply asks me to describe my authentic "real" self. I need to pretend... ah, heck.... I don't need to pretend anything.... I will assume that you don't know me from Adam, and I am here to describe myself. So, the following will be a list of traits that I believe I have manifested all of my life. Let's see how fun and exciting this gets.... (note: these descriptions were taken from the book, followed by my own personal descriptions.)

• Introverted (This may come as a surprise to some, but I am more happy holed up in my personal space than doing just about anything.)
  
• Quiet (This comes from my "shy" side. If I don't know you, chances are I won't talk to you.)
  
• Happy-Go-Lucky (It would typically describe me, unless I get in one of my "moods")
  
• Team Oriented (I usually try to get along with anyone I associate with... whether in my personal life or my professional life.)
  
• Individualistic (For those of you that may have known me back in school, you would remember the "individualistic" side of me. The plaid blazer with contrasting plaid pants. The red, white and blue platform shoes. The trenchcoat. My dad sure hated that thing.)
  
• Shy (Another one that people may have a hard time believing. I can be a very shy person. Most of the time I am.... but, there are the odd times where I am the opposite.)
  
• Generous (I don't have much, but when I do, I am always willing to share. Unless we are talking about my gummy bears... and if THAT is the case, then you may get one. But just one.)
  
• Passionate (I can be very passionate about things that I love. Especially when it comes to music. I remember my wife once reading a blog post about a recent musical discovery and she said that I wrote it as if it were a woman. No wonder things didn't work for us.)
  
• Forgiving (With the exception of Christine Campbell turning me down at the church dance, when I was in 8th grade, I usually forgive anyone for any wrongdoing against me. It may take a little time, but it comes eventually. Christine, if you're out there..... grrrrrrrr.)
  
• Blunt (Whether this trait was instilled in me from a genetic point of view, or if I just learned it from my friend, Craig, I'm not sure.... but fact of the matter is I am BLUNT. If your cellulite shows through your capri pants, I'll let you know. Trust me... I got in serious trouble for that one.)
  
• Rebellious (Although not extremely jealous, I have had a tendency to do things a different way just to be different. I want to be a person to do things on my own, NOT because I have been told to.)
  
• Optimistic (This has always been one of my most positive assets in life. I am an optimist, through and through. I try and see the good in any situation. I try and see the beauty in everyone. Although the lady at the grocery store really pushed that trait to the limit. Heck... there wasn't any beauty.)
  
• Lazy (This one is funny, because I am an extremely hard worker at work. Then, when I get home.... pfffft. I don't know if it is due to the fact that I exert all my energy at work -honestly, I think that is the case... especially in the hot summer-, but when I get home it is very difficult for me to do much.)
  
• Funny (I have always made it a point to make people laugh. I love brightening people's days... and if my humor helps, then I'm happy.)
  
• Peacekeeper (Another trait that usually helps, but sometimes hinders me... I am a peacekeeper. I hate contention. I strive to bring people together. You could say I'm an emotional cupid.)

There you go, folks... tomorrow we will identify my (False) Inferred Self. That should be fun.